In a world that’s finally beginning to understand and embrace neurodiversity, a troubling trend persists: gatekeeping autism. As explored in a recent Psychology Today article, this behavior involves invalidating someone’s autism identity because they don’t “look” or “act” autistic enough — a practice that is not only harmful, but deeply misguided.

Gatekeeping shows up in subtle and overt ways:

• “You’re too high-functioning to be autistic.”

• “You make eye contact, so you can’t really have autism.”

• “You weren’t diagnosed as a child, so it doesn’t count.”

These statements ignore the vast diversity within the autism spectrum. Autism isn’t a one-size-fits-all diagnosis. Some people are verbal, others are nonverbal. Some need daily support, others live independently. Some are diagnosed in early childhood, others in midlife. All are valid.

Gatekeeping harms both individuals and the larger community. It reinforces stereotypes, discourages late diagnoses, invalidates self-advocacy, and isolates those who are already navigating a world not built for their needs.

It’s time to shift the focus from proving one’s diagnosis to respecting lived experience. If someone says they’re autistic — especially if they’ve done the work to seek a diagnosis or self-identify in a thoughtful, informed way — the response should be support, not suspicion.

Autism isn’t a club with a secret handshake. It’s a diverse spectrum of human experience that deserves acceptance, not judgment.

Gatekeeping doesn’t protect the community — it fractures it. Let’s do better.